You are affected by your patterns pt. 2 The Pattern Loop

thinking patterns“Your Ego, what you and other people perceive about yourself, is a series thinking patterns… Every pattern you think is the trigger of another thinking pattern and so on.” Simone Vincenzi

Ciao Belli!!! This is the follow up of You are affected by Your Patterns, a successful post I wrote a couple of weeks ago. If haven’t read it yet I invite you to read it before moving on! Enjoy your readings and please like and share it with the world!!!! ahaha!!

Moving on…

I am sure you can agree with me you have your own pattern for every given situation isn’t it?

NO??? Think about your life. How many times you can say: “It always happen to me??” Or how many times you do the same things over and over again?

And this is perfectly normal, this is how we function. Our breath is regulated by a pattern, our heartbeat, each single movement we do or word we speak. Even every single thing we feel is regulated by a pattern.

Also, as you can clearly see, every pattern, automatically, is the beginning of the following pattern. Creating a cycle.

I call this cycle: Pattern Loop.

What do I mean about Pattern Loop?

A Pattern Loop is a cycle of patterns where each pattern is the trigger of the following pattern.

Let me repeat it again for you:

A pattern loop is a cycle of patterns where each pattern is the trigger of the following pattern.

Let me give you an example.

Gigi started his day waking up. 1st pattern, that triggered the “going to toilet” 2nd pattern, who triggered the “washing up” pattern and so on…

But now I want you to imagine ..

If a new pattern is introduced in that routine what will then happen?

Let me give you an example. Let’s say the new pattern of not waking up and stay in bad clicks in. What pattern in your opinion will be triggered next? Gigi, obviously, will not follow the series of patterns it was used to follow.

Does it make sense?

Great!

How is Gigi’s day linked with how our mind works?

Our mind works in the same way. We have a series of thoughts that, repeated over and over again, become patterns. Those patterns are, what NLP calls, our Beliefs. The power of those patterns, or beliefs is that they affect the pattern feelings.

What does it mean? You know, you are thinking every moment, even if you are not aware of it. Your blood pressure, your heartbeat, your digestion is all controlled by thoughts. The only matter is that you are not aware of it. So think about it closely. If a thought has the capability to control what makes us alive on this planet…. What can the impact of a thought be in our life?

On the next post we are going to dig down into the rabbit hole of our patterns and since then…

Enjoy Your Life!!!

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!! for audioblogs, videos and motivational contents.

May You create your own patterns!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

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How to elicit core values.

core values“Everybody talks about values. When we talk about market values, added values, business values, people values we are referring to the inner force driving everything towards the ultimate destination”.          – Simone Vincenzi

Hello dear souls! I hope I am finding you well and happy with this post.

If you are now reading this post, it means you are looking for something deeper that what you just perceive. It means that you are looking for the reason why, the inner force that drives you towards the choices you make on a daily basis.

If you haven’t read yet the first post I have written about Values, and you are asking yourself the question What are my Core Values?, I invite you to read now also What do You VALUE the most?.

Neuro Linguistic Programming call those inner forces Core Values. This is what are our human values. An inner force that drive us towards every decision we make, each moment of our life. It is a big statement, I know! But what if this is actually true? What if we really have some moral values that are, ultimately, shaping our destiny and what we get from life? What if there is an energy that, starting from our subconscious mind direct us, like rails, on the destination we are going to achieve?

Now that we have understood how much our values are determining our whole life, the question that might pop into your head now could be:

What can I do to elicit my values?

If You are asking yourself this question you are going the find the answer in the following paragraphs.

As you understood perfectly, eliciting our values is the most important thing we can do to check if what we are doing, the actions we take and the decision we make, are in alignment with who we really are and what is subconsciously driving us.

When You are aware of what your core values are you will be able to make the right choice in every given situation,without stepping in any self-sabotaging behaviour, which 90% of the time, comes from an incongruity between our beliefs, actions and our inner values.

Can You see now how important is to be aware of your Core Values?

Now, following, you find a process that will support you during the elicitation of Your Core Values. Invite you to keep asking those questions for, at least, 5 min and dig deeper every time. Sometimes our Operational Values got hidden from our Idealistic Values.

If you want to know what is the difference between our Operational Values and our Idealistic Values you might want to read                                                            What do You VALUE the most?

Enjoy the Process and have fun while doing it. There is no right or wrong answer, just your perfect and whole being.

I invite you also to share your thought at the bottom of the page after the exercise. How did you found it?

Your turn

Now chose an area of your Life. Like Career, Fun, Family, Friends, Leisure, Health, Love, Relationships…. Pick up the area that is the most important for you right now and ask yourself the following questions.  I invite you also to write down the answers so you can keep track of your thoughts.

  1. What is most important to you in the chosen area?
  2. What else?
  3. Keep asking those questions at least for 5 min and write down the first thing that is coming up into your mind, even if it is the same of the previous thought.
  4. Then look at the way you make decision in the chosen area. Pick up a couple of times when you had to make important decisions in those areas.
  5. What Value was that decision serving? Was it adventure. security, uncertainty, love, contribution, growth, appreciation…?
  6. Now pick up another example and ask the same question.
  7. Now think about what pushes your button in the chosen area, what is that really moves you to take action?
  8. And now find the patterns. Assessing your decisions, actions, thoughts and feelings, What is the value that has been served the most.

In this post you have learnt how your core values are affecting your reality and one of the most effective way to elicit them. Now that you have this awareness I am confident you are going to assess accurately what decision to make in alignment with what is driving you.

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!! for audioblogs, videos and motivational contents.

May You live according to your values!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

The secret of emotional intelligence

emotional intelligenceLife is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.  – Lao Tzu

Halo halo!! Great to connect with you again! I wish I am finding you well, happy and healthy!

As you can see from the title, today’s post is about Emotional Intelligence and the Secret of  Your Emotional Intelligence.

First of all…

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence, as the name says is the intelligence of an emotion, where Intelligence is defined as the capacity for learning, reasoning, understanding, grasping truths, relationships,facts, meanings manifesting a high mental capacity. Emotional, of the emotions. Where Emotions are defined as the flow of energy that, moving through the body, generates every feeling.

Do you mean emotions are clever?

Yes! More than you think! Studying how different emotions interact and move into the body we understood that they, like any other form of energy, have a life and respond to our thoughts, actions and intentions.

See your emotions as a friend that gives you an answer for every question you make. Your questions are your thoughts, conscious and subconscious. We are constantly thinking and constantly asking questions that are answered by God, The Divine, The Universe, The Quantum Field (however you want to name it) with an emotion. Emotions, as Gregg Braden says, are the language in which we communicate with God and vice versa.

Using the personification of an emotion we can easily see that if we treat a friend with love, respect, care, appreciation and gratitude, we are going to develop a long lasting friendship.

If we, instead, neglect our friend, forget about him, don’t take care about him and escape from him, this friend is going to be very angry and react to us in an aggressive manner.

You are telling me that our emotions behave like living beings?

You got it!! Our emotions, if nurtured, cared and accepted are going to take care of us in return. If not, they are going to be very upset and to raise their voice because they want to be heard.

Let me ask you a question…

Do you prefer a friend who try to change you and want you to be somebody else, or a friend that accept and love you as you are, because who are you?

If your answer is the first… well, is better you assess who is surrounding you…                      If your answer is the second you can perfectly understand how an emotion can feel when not accepted. If you, on the other hand, accept the emotion fully and appreciate it as it is, you will experience a major shift in that emotion, who will express your gratitude towards you.

 Are you saying that if I express my gratitude and appreciation towards an emotion, no matter what the emotion is, I will feel a shift in the emotion?

Yes! This is how Emotional Intelligence work! Emotions, as every other energy, act like a mirror. They will reflect you back what you are sending out. In other terms I am talking about the Laws of Attraction. What you send out, you are going to get back.

This is why is so important to accept and nurture you emotions constantly. More Love, Appreciation, Gratitude, Acceptance you send out, more Love, Appreciation, Gratitude, Acceptance you are going to receive from your inner world.

This is just a little slice of the fascinating world of emotions.

If You want to know the most effective technique to Accept Your Emotions keep following us!! I am going to share a juicy technique I use daily that made major shifts in my life and in the life of million of people around the world.

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!! for audioblogs, videos and motivational contents.

May You appreciate and accept your emotions!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

What do You VALUE the most?

Values-cartoon“Our Values and Beliefs are the driving force of our life.” Tony Robbins

Hi, I wish I am finding you well and full of energy!! Following a meaningful conversation, I had yesterday with a dear friend of mine from Italy, about what moves people’s behaviours and actions I realised I didn’t post, so far, anything about Values. So I take the chance to explore deeper the subject with you with this blog post. 

I believe firmly now that our Values and our Beliefs determine the attitude we have towards life and therefore what we gain in Life.

So, What are our Values?

Our Values are the labels, the emotional state that we value the most in every area of our life. We have different emotional states, that we are constantly looking to meet or to avoid. We have made these “choices” in the early days of our growth, borrowing them from our parents, society and all that had an influence in our life.

If I ask you:

 “What is most important to you in Life?”

Everybody is going to come up with a different answer. This answer is one of the Values that are ruling his life.

 Values are single words that express a defined emotional state that we want to reach or avoid.

We have different Values for every area of our life. We have values for finances, relationships, health, leisure, etch…. and they are subconsciously driving us, conditioning our life and ultimately control our destiny. Moreover, our values, being subconscious patterns, play a mayor role on what we attract in our life.

 You definitely agree with me that:

 “What we attract in our Life is a mirror of our inner values and beliefs.”

Having awareness of the values that rule our life, is the first step on taking control of our life and understand why we make certain decision and why we act and behave the way we do.

 Awareness is always the key.

 We can divide our values into 2 different categories.

 

  1. Moving Towards Values
  2. Moving Away From Values

 Each category is divided into 4 different sub-groups:

 

  1. Mean Values
  2. End Values
  3. Idealistic Values
  4. Operational Values

 

MOVING TOWARDS AND MOVING AWAY FROM VALUES

 As previously said, Values are single words that express a defined emotional state.

 You agree with me that in life there are some emotional state that we want to reach and emotional state that we want to avoid. Isn’t it?

 

  1. Moving Towards Values: Are the Values, the emotional state that we want to feel, These pleasurable states that we value most are the ‘Moving-Toward’ values because these are the emotional states that we will do the most to attain. Some of these values are:

Love, Success, Freedom, Intimacy, Security, Adventure, Power, Passion, Comfort, Health.

 

  1. Moving Away From Values: Are the Values, the emotional states we do the most to avoid.

Rejection, Anger, Frustration, Loneliness, Depression, Failure, Humiliation, Guilt.

 We always have a hierarchy of Values in each area of our life and we always have, in each category, one that is most important for us.

 The awareness of our Values is the first step of living the life out of integrity and purpose you are committed to live.

 One interesting thing, that you might not know, is that conflicting values are the source of our self-sabotage. We might value success as Moving Forward Value, and we might fear rejection as Moving Away From Value. How can a person be successful if afraid of facing rejection? As soon as that person will feel rejected it will instantly sabotage himself and his success.

 Can You see how important are our Values?

 Now I just want to give You a brief introduction about the other sub-groups of your Values System.

 

  1. Mean Values: Family, Friends, Work, Life… These are just the surface, they are not the feelings we are looking for.
  2. End Values: These are the feelings. This is what we are looking for. They answer the questions: “What is most important to me in……?”, “How does……….makes me feel?”
  3. Idealistic Values: Are the values that we want to achieve in the future, or that are ideal for us, but not necessarily the ones that are operating now.
  4. Operational Values: The Moving Towards Values and Moving Away From Values that are operating at the moment.

What are Your values?

What is controlling the direction of your life right now?

Your Turn

I invite you now to consciously make the effort to explore your values and to make it a priority. You will understand so much about you and you’ll be able to make, consciously, the best choice in alignment with who you truly are.

In the next post I will share with you the most effective exercises to elicit your core values in every area of your life.

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!!

May You always follow your passion!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

 

Beliefs: a simple definition

beliefs“Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their life and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their life.”  Anthony Robbins

Have You ever met a person that behaves in a different way than You? Have You ever met a person that seems to act as if everything was possible? And have you ever met a person who lived their life playing small, stuck in his own daily routine and never thriving for more? What is the difference between those people? What is that make a person achieve what for other people seems impossible?

Henry Ford answered this question in a very simplistic but profound way saying that: “Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you are right”.

 

Starting from these powerful quotes from Anthony Robbins and Henry Ford we can start to understand the impact and the role that our beliefs play in our lives. But before getting deeper into details is necessary to have a foundation about what they are and how they develop.

What is a belief?

The dictionary definition says a belief is: “A principle accepted as true or real without a proof . An opinion, a conviction”. 

Anthony Robbins define a belief as “A feeling of certainty that shapes the direction of our life.”

Beliefs are the thoughts and ideas that are no longer questioned. They have the power to create or destroy, because every thoughts, expectation and action is a direct result of such beliefs, and they shape the direction of our life.

Beliefs are the lens, the filter through what we see our and other people’s life. They decide the meaning we give to our experiences.

Where do our beliefs come from?

They come from other people like parents, teachers, peer group, friends, family, media, religion and society. From anyone who had or is still having an influence over us.

They are mainly formed subconsciously during childhood and adolescence.

 

When we are children our brain is like a little sponge and our experiences are what the sponge take in. This sponge doesn’t have the capability to distinguish what is good or not for us, what is positive and negative. It takes everything in, growing and growing.

Sometimes the message we receive from the outer world, from our experiences, are not always empowering  and encouraging, and maybe once we learned that we were clumsy, stupid, not good enough, not beautiful etch…. and in that moment, we made the decision, perhaps, that it is not safe to speak up, that we don’t deserve an amazing life, that we cannot do certain things because we are limited. We kept buying into our limitations repetitively, and that behaviour became so integrated into ourself that it became automatic, and we lost the awareness of it, accepting it as normal and setting it as our personal standard. Forgetting our reality, forgetting that the decision we made was based on somebody else’s belief about us.

Wow… so Who I am now and what I believe about myself has been shaped through years by other people…

Yes, and this is how we form our sense of identity. Our identity is just a set of beliefs we borrowed from other people. And I’m not saying that this has been always negative for us. Also the positive things we believe about ourself come from the same process. But behavioural scientists and child psychologist generally accept that children, under the age of five, receive ten or more negative phrases from their parents for every single positive one.

mmm… does it mean there is nothing I can do about it?

It is exactly the opposite! We have a lot of different tools that used all together can create everlasting results and positive changes in our life. In the following posts I’m going to share with You what I found most effective after several years of experiences.

Your Turn

When talking about beliefs, the most important thing we can do at the beginning is to be aware of them, without judgement. A belief is a thought that we repeat over and over again and that has an high emotional intensity.

One way to spot our negative beliefs is to have little notebook with us through the day and, whenever we catch ourself thinking a thought, write it down. In this way we create our Thoughts Journal.

Make the commitment for the next 3 days to write down all your thoughts you become aware of. If it is difficult to remember the task, write a note or set a reminder on your phone with the question: “What am I thinking now?”

You’ll be amazed by the result. And that will be the starting point to embrace your current limiting beliefs and change them with empowering ones!

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!!

May You always believe in Yourself!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

How to Trigger a “Rock n Roll Star” State

“It is not who you are that holds you back, is who you think you are not” Hanoch McCartney.

Following “The TEAD Principle of Self Management” in Today’s post I’ll share with You one of the main tools to change Your state.

Anthony Robbins said: “There are no unresourceful people, just unresourceful states”. 

What does it mean?

It means that You have always, at all time, the resources within You to face every situation in the best way You can. Can You remember a moment where You acted under Your standards? A moment where You feeling down and even brushing Your teeth seemed an harsh? Can You remember a moment, on the other hand, were You had a great idea? Or a moment that You were You did something that You thought was impossible for You? What was the difference? It wasn’t another person!!! It was the state You were in that affected Your performances.

…mmm… If state affect performances, what does affect our state?

Great question!! It is the quality of Our Emotions that effect our State. Our state is the direct result of the Emotion we are feeling in every given moment. Managing Our emotions, we can affect our state and then managing our Life. I’ll tell You more about emotions in the following posts because this is a huge topic by himself! Is it Ok?

Ok!!! I’m really curious about it!! And then, If Emotions change the State I’m in and the State I’m in affect my Life, How can I change my Emotions and my State?

Ahhh…. Getting curious eh?Very Good question! There different tools and ways to change our Emotional State. Some of them come from ancient spiritual practices while others come from modern technologies and psychologies.

I’m going to share with You what I found most useful and effective for myself after years of experience. I’ve learned most of the process from Anthony Robbins. In his 4 days seminar Unleash the Power from Within, he condition the audience to achieve a peak state through all the first day.

I’m going now to brake down this model for You, so You can have immediate results in changing Your Emotional State.

Are You ready??

Yes!!!

1. AWARENESS

First of all You must be aware of the state You are in. Remember, You are not Your State! You can decide to associate with it if it is a positive and empowering state or dissociate if it is a negative state. If You say “I’m depressed”, You are associating Your Identity with a feeling that is not You, and You start believing that is true. If You, on the other hand say: “I feel down”, You are acknowledging  that this is just how You feel. Feel Your feelings in that moment and be aware of what is the message behind that feeling. Once You have the awareness You can, then, create the change towards the State You desire.

2. PHYSIOLOGY

Emotion means “Energy in Motion”. An emotion is energy stored in Your body. The body, when moving, changes his energy and changing the energy of the body You can change the energy of the emotions. Moving Your body, change Your breathing, breath deeply, look up and stand up straight. These are all changes that You can make in second. Or even better, go for a run or for a light physical activity. Light Physical activity is the best way release a stream of serotonin in our body.

3.FOCUS

Energy flows where the focus goes. When You focus on the negative You constantly attracting more negative thoughts and negative experiences. You are directing Your energy towards that direction and You are telling Your subconscious that You want to experience more of that feeling. If You, instead, focus on what is good, positive, on what You are grateful for, You telling Your subconscious to search for it, and as end result it will attract more positive experiences. Think about an happy moment, a moment of deep spiritual connection, a loving moment… How You feel?

4. LANGUAGE

“Every word You Speak and Every thought You think create Your reality” Louise Hay. How we speak and what we speak is one of the way we communicate with our subconscious mind. And, the first person we always communicate with first is ourself. Through our language and our thoughts we are the creator of our own Unique experience. Negative and disempowering language can affect our Life in the direction we don’t want to go. Positive and empowering language drives us in the direction we want.

Your Turn

  • What is a negative emotion You are feeling in this period of Your life?
  • Change Your Posture now, change the way You breath, Look up!!
  • Now think about an empowering moment, a successful moment, a joyful moment, a sexy moment!!
  • Now what can You tell to Yourself that will lead You in the direction You want to go?

WELL DONE!!

Did You Like the exercise?

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!!

May Your state be always Rock n Roll!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~

The TEAD principle of self management.

“What could we accomplish if we knew we could not fail?” Eleanor Roosvelt

Do You know what is the difference between a confident person and a person who doesn’t even look up? What is the difference between achievers and followers? What is the difference between an happy person and a sad one?

mmmm.. no.. I don’t know… maybe their attitude?

Good guess!! And what is behind the attitude of a person? Behind the attitude of a person lies the way his able to manage his state. Quoting the personal development guru Anthony Robbins “There are no unresourceful people, just unresourceful states”. Have You ever experienced a moment of light bulb? or when You were performing above Your usual standards? I’m sure You did! And this is not because You changed the skin You were in, but because You changed Your internal state, tapping into Your Resourceful Self.

So…. You are telling me that every result I can achieve depends by the State I’m in…

Bunga!!!! I’m a great believer of the TEAD theory. TEAD stands for: Thoughts, Emotions, Actions, Direction. It is an ever ending cycle.

What we think determine the way we feel; our feelings determine our performances; our performances determine our Life.

1. THOUGHTS: 

It has been estimated that we have 70.000 thoughts per day. (I don’t know who decided to count them!! :))  70% of these thoughts are almost the same, like a tape on repeat. Has been shown that, generally, these 70% of thoughts are negative and disempowering. Can You see now how much impact can thoughts have in our Life? How can we live an happy and successful life if what we thing most of the time comes from our worries and problems?  Each of our thoughts has a measurable electromagnetic field and can influence the whole chemistries of our body, blood pressure, hormones and the one of the people around us. Also, our thoughts, when repeated, create strong neurological patterns that creates our habits. Sometimes we are so use to that repeating tape that we are not even aware of it. Being aware of our thoughts is the first step that we can take towards changing the limiting patterns.

2. EMOTIONS:

Every thought we experience, interact with the energetic field of our body, linking to our past experiences. Every thought. as said before, create changes in the chemistry of the body, changing the emotional state we are in. So what are emotions? Emotions can be described as “Energy in Motion”. Emotions are changes in our energetic field and are influenced by the patterns of thoughts and biochemicals released in our body. Everything we think create and generate a different emotions. Some of them can create a positive change in our field, releasing “happy hormones” like serotonin and dopamine, while others can trigger stress hormones like adrenaline and noradrenaline. In conclusion If we think positive thoughts, we are going to trigger positive emotions.

 3. ACTIONS:

Our emotions have the power to change the state we are in. State can be defined as the mental and physical attitude we have in every given situation. In which state can our action be more successful? Easy to guess!! More we are in a joyous and happy state, more resourceful we are. More we stay in a negative or depression state, less power we have. In conclusion we can say that the state we are in determine the performance of our daily actions.

4. LIFE DIRECTION:

“Show me the actions of a man and I’ll tell You his destiny”. Every action (or inaction) is a step towards one direction. Our actions and performances determine our Life direction and ultimately Our Destiny. This is why our life a reflection of our daily actions. Having in mind what is the direction we want our Life to take, we can plan our actions accordingly.

Wow!! All this is uber fascinating!! But How can I change my state?

Ahahah!!! I’m glad You enjoyed it!! And You are really curious!! So don’t miss out my next post “How to trigger a “rock n’ roll star” state”.

Your Turn

  • Now close Your eyes, and take 3 deep breath… That’s good. Think about something negative, experience it, hear it, feel it. What do You notice? What changes happens in Your body?What changes happens in Your body? Your breath? Your posture? Your voice? Your inner voice?
  • Now shake Yourself a bit. Jump or walk around.
  • Close again Your eyes and think about something SEXY or JUCY that You Love. Think About something that makes You really HAPPY! What do You notice?

Did You Like the exercise?

I’d love to hear from You and what do You think about the article.

Please Like this post if you found value here and share your awesome thoughts in the comments below.

Oh, and remember to subscribe to my weekly newsletter!!!

May Your state be always Happy!!

Simone Vincenzi                 ~Your Power to Shine~